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It’s that time of the year, again. The day we pretend to care about Mexico’s conquest at the 1862 battle of Puebla during the Franco-Mexican War.

Oh, yeah that’s Cinco de Mayo we’re talking about, a weird holiday to celebrate in Miami. Consider the facts: A minor win for Puebla and it only took 6 more years for the French to pack up their baguettes and berets and head on out.  Doesn’t really sound like a whole lot of reason to celebrate.

Insenstive? Probably.

Now that we got the facts out of the way and you are informed of what we are actually commemorating, milk it.

Milk it with some dancing, some tacos, some beer and some tequila, no better yet—some mezcal.

Calling sick tomorrow? Probably. Here’s why:

 

For those that love to mix it up with a taste of New York…

The Rum Line kicks off the fiesta as it welcomes Manhattan’s gourmet Mexican eatery, El Toro Blanco, to Miami for an exclusive Cinco de Mayo Takeover. Festivities begin on Tuesday, May 5th from 6PM until 12AM with live entertainment, party favors, and Happy Hour specials starting at $4 for Modelo and Micheladas; $5 for Margaritas, Paloma’s and Ancho Mexican Fireball Shots; and $7 for Mexican inspired cocktails. Guests can enjoy bites and libations on The Rum Line’s alluring deck inspired by El Toro Blanco’s contemporary Mexican cuisine including a variety of small plates such as shrimp a la plancha and mini pulled pork empanadas in addition to tacos served a la carte or as a taco platter ($16) with three tacos of choice – Al pastor with slow roasted pork, grilled pineapple, red onion and avocado; chipotle glazed grilled shrimp with roasted tomato and avocado; and grilled swordfish with chipotle slaw and pico de gallo.  The Rum Line is tucked away on the terrace of the St. Moritz Tower at the iconic Loews Miami Beach Hotel – adjacent to its award-winning hotspot Lure Fishbar – at 1601 Collins Avenue. Telephone: (305) 695-0110.

For those that want to see if they can still catch a rooftop breeze…

The Gale Rooftop goes big for Cinco de Mayo. On the Fifth of May, celebrate Mexican pride at The Gale Rooftop’s grand Cinco de Mayo party from 6pm-11pm. Guests will enjoy live music by DJ Pirate Stereo and the Fox Brothers while sipping on tequila and margaritas via the tequila station and build-your-own margarita bar. The party goes over the top with piñatas to break and a dog adoption area. The Cinco de Mayo Party is free.

The Gale Rooftop is located inside the Gale South Beach at 1690 Collins Ave Miami Beach, FL 33139. Telephone: (305) 673-0199

For those that want eat tacos and dance until 5 am…

Bodega Taqueria y Tequila will be throwing the biggest Cinco de Mayo neighborhood block party from 12pm – 5am! On Tuesday, May 5th Bodega will be featuring mariachi band, Fiesta Grande, along with drink specials including $5 Modelos and $6 margaritas all day from the food truck. In the evening, $5 shot specials will start at 6pm along with music and a churro cart outside featuring complimentary churros. In addition, Bodega will be featuring a “shot chair” where two lovely ladies will be pouring tequila shots directly into guests’ mouths. Take a picture in the chair and hashtag #dobellayback to get the chance to receive a free bottle of Dobel tequila. There will also be a piñata, sombreros and maracas for guests!

To soak up all the drinks, Bodega’s full menu will be available as well. Guests can order from a wide variety of tacos including the Al Pastor, spit- broiled pork, charred pineapple, red onion, cilantro, salsa rosada and the Camaron BLT, grilled shrimp, bacon, lettuce, tomato, chipotle-cotija dressing. Tortas de la Bodega options include the Frita, Mexican chorizo, roasted peppers, Oaxaca, potato sticks, chipotle-cotija dressing and the Late-Night, guajillo braised short rib, bacon, black bean refrito, Oaxaca, habanero soaked onion straws, salsa rosada.

Bodega Taqueria y Tequila 
is located at 1220 16TH Street
 Miami Beach, FL 33139. Telephone: (305) 704-2145

For those that like to drink and learn something at the same time…

Radio Bar is offering an alternative to the usual beer drinking on Cinco de Mayo with its monthly mixology class. On Tuesday, May 5th Radio Bar will be hosting its May Mixology Class from 7pm-8pm. In honor of Cinco de Mayo, the spirit this month will be tequila. Radio bartender, Teddy Collins, and a special guest will be teaching attendees how to make two tequila cocktails with giveaways at the end of the session.  Radio Bar will also be open to dance off your feet from 8:00pm – close.

Radio Bar 
is located at 814 First Street Miami Beach, FL 33139  (305) 397-8382

For those that want a 5-course dinner and drink beer… and shots of tequila

The Federal, beer enthusiast Evan Benn and John J. Wakefield of Wakefield Brewery are teaming up to host a Mexico-meets-Miami Cinco de Mayo celebration with specially treated beers just for the dinner – they even included the very last keg of Harbinger Imperial Sweet Stout reserve which won’t be brewed again until the winter.

The evening will begin with a cocktail session including Passion Fruit Margarita Berlinerweisse and appetizers will be passed around along with tequila shots as an added bonus at 7pm.

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Guest will be seated for dinner at 7:30pm.Chef Cesar Zapata has carefully prepared and paired a five course menu which will include seasonal and locally grown vegetarian options of hibiscus jefe and tamarind stush. Seafood options are filled with flavors of granbana, kefir lime leaf, mango, mamey, and red bell peppers. A sweet dessert of chocolate covered churros with infused coffee and chile tequila brings the meal to a close. Price: $65 per person plus tax & tip. For reservations call 305.758.9559. The Federal is located at 5132 Biscayne Blvd, Miami, FL 33137.